Picking up from my thoughts yesterday...
Now my Mother, dealing with this immature and angry husband, a financial mess, financially supporting the family, and all the challenges of raising four young children under the age of 10 chose another path. This is what I call the path of hope.
First, she refused to give into self pity. There was no grumbling or complaining about how tough it was (and believe me it was really tough). She lived the adage of Charles R Swindoll
We have a choice everyday regarding
the attitude we will embrace for that day
I agree that maybe behind the scenes, away from her children, she sobbed. I hope she did!
There is a proper place and time to let it all out. But in front of her children she chose to be calm, cheerful and stable. My memories of riding to the grocery store with her was being with a happy person who invariably allowed me to buy a soda or some treat even though we couldn’t afford it. How could she be a happy person amidst her own private nightmare of disappointment? Abraham Lincoln said it, “most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
The first choice we have to make if we want to walk the path to hope is to fight self pity like the plague! No moaning, groaning and complaining about how difficult it is. It helps, I find, to remind myself that everybody has it tough right now. Everybody takes hits in life. Everybody gets tagged with pain. Just about the time I think I'm suffering, one of you shares a situation that puts me under the table!
Remember BP Executive Tony Hayward's gaff, "I'd like to get my life back?" Self pity is an immediate turnoff to the people around us. An essential lesson of leadership is knowing when to keep your mouth shut. I know I'm still learning this lesson.
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